Attracting men with waist beads-Struggling with Celibacy

Hey Queens! I’m back again with more to share about my new sacral chakra energy waist bead that I added to my body! If you read my last blog you will understand why I was struggling with intimacy and why I started wearing this bead to help myself heal from sexual trauma and it is working faster than I expected! I’ve only been wearing this waist bead for a little over a month and I don’t see myself taking it off any time soon because I love the energy it’s bringing me. I’m going to share why: before I used to really hate when guys would be “Interested” in me because I felt like men just want one thing and if you don’t give it to them then they’ll take it and that always scared me so I was celibate out of fear. But after I put on my “sexy bead” (thats my nickname for it because the energy is associated with passion, creativity, intimacy sensuality/sexuality) I really started changing. My waist bead attracted this one guy that was very attractive to me so I decided to give him a chance. Now even though I put on this bead to heal my sexual trauma, I was not sure if I was ready to have sex just yet. However I was shocked to see that when I said no, he respected my wishes and didn’t force himself on me. That was very overwhelming for me because I did not know what would happen but I was glad that I didn’t get raped again so I felt good. Our next encounter we almost had sex but I said no again even though I kinda wanted to, I ultimately didn’t believe he deserved for me to give it up so easily. After all, I have been holding out for a long time so why should I just give it up to you? What makes you so worthy of receiving my entire vagina? After I rejected him a second time, I feel he got frustrated with me not wanting to open up and have sex with him so he started closing himself off from me. I could tell a difference in his behavior but I wasn’t bothered by it because I figured if he really wants to be with me sexually, he needs to prove himself worthy. Since then I have really been struggling with whether or not I should remain celibate or if I should start my celibacy journey over. Its a very conflicting emotion that I’m dealing with because a part of me wants to build an intimate connection with a man but then a part of me feels like I should wait until I meet the right man first. But then I also think, what if I already met the right man and I’m letting my fears stand in the way of forming an intimate connection? I cannot deny that men obviously feel more emotionally connected through sex but when you’ve been sexual abused, it kinda puts sex in the back of your mind. I’m still learning a lot about myself so I don’t know what I’m going to do. My waist bead attracted another man that I’m really attracted to and I don’t know what I’m gonna do if things ever get serious between us! Should I wait or should I give it up if the time is right? What will make a man worthy of me having sex with him? Or should I try to see if a man will be celibate with me until the time is right? I’m not sure how things will be for me but I will say I am more excited than I have ever been before about attracting men that I am also attracted to and seeing what happens between us so thats a good thing! That means I’m healing well :) What are some of your thoughts?

Thanks for letting me share! Feel free to leave comments and questions.

Good luck to you on your own waist bead journey!

Love Always,

Malon Mahotiere

Healing sexual trauma with waist beads and meditation

Hey Queens! So I decided to get very personal on this blog because I am hoping that it will help another Queen out. As some of you may know, I have been celibate for the past 4 years but what a lot of people don’t know is why I made the decision to be celibate. I was in a sexually abusive relationship and it really took a toll on me. He was also very controlling and I feared that he would eventually get physically abusive so I left the relationship. However that did not stop him from sexually assaulting me before I left for military training in the Air Force. I believe he wanted to have sex with me before I left and I would not have sex with him since we broke up so he took something from me without my consent or permission. When I was in basic training, I learned about sexual assault and rape. It was very hard for me to sit through certain classes on the topic because I knew I was a victim of sexual abuse and I was suffering from serious sexual trauma during my training. I had nightmares of the incident and I was not able to sleep well either but I overcame these adversities and decided to get baptized the last Sunday of training and that is when I started my celibacy journey March 2015. Unfortunately, when I came home I was sexually assaulted by another man I was dating but this time I could not deal with the trauma because I was still suffering from the first assault. It became too much for me so I decided to report both assaults and I received medical attention in order to help overcome the emotional turmoil I was experiencing. I suffered from severe depression and actually was dual diagnosed. I’ve been in therapy for more than sexual trauma because it brought back more unwanted memories from abuse I suffered from in my childhood and also the grief of losing my parents. After extensive therapy, I was able to overcome my depression and also the trauma associated with the sexual assault such as guilt, shame, and negative self belief. I have over came so much and I am so proud of my progress and growth which is why I want to share this with you all. There was only one problem. I stopped dating for 4 years. I did not go out with any men and I especially didn’t get in their bed. I was so afraid of being raped again that I just avoid men all together which is a sign that you are not healed from trauma: avoidance. I went through a phase where I hated men so much and I knew that was not healthy so I even requested for a male therapist so I can change my way of thinking. I am still recovering and healing however I felt like I needed more help so of course I turned to my waist beads. I added a waist bead that is associated with your sacral chakra which is responsible for passion, sexuality, intimacy, creativity and joy. This energy is used to allow us to improve our relationships with ourselves and others. When I added it to my body, I continued meditating The Heart Chakra before bed which I still continue to do because it is associated with healing hurt and grievances from past experiences. When your heart chakra is open, it allows you to accept love from others and yourself. It also helps you forgive those who have hurt you and also for releasing the fear of betrayal or hatred towards yourself and others. With that being said, I can now say that I feel a lot better about myself and my sexual trauma. I feel completely healed and ready to love again and also except love from others. It will be a process though because I have been through a lot in my life but I am just glad I am healed to the point where I am not closing myself off anymore. Something else I used to do a lot was sabotage relationships with men on purpose because I was not fully healed. I did not believe a man could truly love me for any reason other than sex. I really believed I was damaged and I did not know my worth but I am not in that place anymore. But there was a lot of self work that I had to do along with therapy and it seemed like NOTHING was working. I still feared love, and I still feared men raping me. So I decided to take it to the next level and add a waist bead to help me overcome this very serious issue and it has helped me so much! I love my intimacy waist bead! Thank you for letting me share my story, I hope this can help another fellow waist bead Queen. I will continue to update you on my progress while wearing this bead and also share more details on my journey through healing my sexual trauma. If you have any questions please ask them or leave comments. Much blessings to all of you on your journey!

Love Always,

Malon Mahotiere

Tradition of waist beads

African tradition of waist beads developed during the ancient times. In Ancient Egypt they were identified as girdles worn by women as a status symbol. In West Africa, the tradition was popular for the Yoruba tribe. The tradition of waist beads originated among the Yoruba tribe mainly in Nigeria. Yoruba women wore waist beads during traditional ceremonies. Women who were given waist beads during marriage ceremonies would add more waist beads to seduce their husbands but tradition forbids a woman from showing her marital waist beads to a person of the opposite sex outside the marriage. The tradition of waist beads is also in Ghana where they signified wealth and aristocracy as well as femininity. In Ghanaian culture, waist beads play a significant role in the customs of self expression. Beads in Ghanaian culture can be used as a tool for communication to express messages, symbols, or ideas. Modern tradition of waist beads is for weight control and management. Waist beads can be given during Tribal ceremonies as part of tradition. For example, when a young girl is becoming of age, she is adorned with beads. Waist beads were worn for spiritual purposes among many West African tribes for spiritual protection. They believed the beads impact the knowledge and wisdom of family ancestors. Waist beads worn for a particular significance can attract spiritual energy based on the sequences of color, their importance and symbolism. This can bring a source of inspiration and spiritual enlightenment which is why some waist beads are created to wear for an intended purpose. Women in Guinea would wear waist beads as tradition to indicate their marital status. If their waist beads were visible that means they have no suitor. If their waist beads are hidden, that indicates that they have a suitor or a partner and waist beads are only mean to be seen by their lover or husband. Traditionally, belly dancers or Islamic women in East African cultures would display their beads over their clothes or on bare midriffs. Women from several other African countries have been known to wear waist beads for tradition. A few of those African countries are: Senegal, Ivory Coast, Gambia, Liberia, Sierra Leone, Kenya, and Ethiopia.

Waist Beads for Intimacy

Hello everyone!

I wanted to discuss waist beads and why so many women are interested in the benefit of wearing them, especially in the bedroom. I have sold waist beads to several women all over the country and even a few men who purchased for a special woman in their life. I was told by a few men that they enjoy seeing waist beads on a woman’s body because it is like a decoration. But waist beads are more than decoration to enhance a womans physique. Waist beads can be used for several reasons but to heighten an intimate connection between two lovers is one of the benefits of wearing waist beads for intimacy.

In my first blog I explained how you can use waist beads for celibacy purposes based on my own personal choice. Waist beads traditionally are worn for spiritual purposes however women can wear them for their own personal reason. For this blog I decided to share some information for those who are interested in how they can use waist beads to enhance an intimate connection for them and their partner or lover. Historically, African women would use waist beads to lure their suitable mates by rattling the beads for seduction. Women wearing the waist beads during love making with those mates would create an erotic pleasure due to the sight of the beads that enhances a woman’s physique and also the sound of the beads during the love making experience

Your entire sexual world will be a deeper level of passion when you wear waist beads for your partner.

Heres a few reasons why:

  1. You will look amazing with your beads on and your partner will be more attracted to your body

  2. It gives you the freedom to be versatile with your sexual life. For example: switching out waist beads, wearing different colors for different moods, or different styles and designs on occasion

  3. A deeper spiritual connection can develop through waist beads and praying with your partner

  4. Attract and transfer energy between lovers. For example: a waist bead designed for your chakra energy can be worn to inspire, create, prosper which can be transmitted through sexual energy

  5. Recharge your sexuality and sensuality. For example: creating a desire for a sexual fantasy

  6. Celebrate your unique style through this exotic jewelry and expression of the love you share

I hope you found this information helpful the next time you’re considering wearing waist beads for your lover! Thank you for reading and visiting my website! Please leave comments, ask questions and share experiences

Waist Beads for Celibacy


Waist beads are worn for many purposes and purity is one of them for young women. However, waist beads can be given as a gift to women who are preparing to marry. If you are single or do not have a lover in your life, you can still wear waist beads to prepare you to become a wife. 

Waist beads can be worn to enhance a sexual experience between a woman and her husband. They help incite an emotional connection between the two. Now if you are single or unmarried, you may still want to wear beads for a better sexual experience but what if you are celibate?

I recently made the decision to save myself until marriage. I have been celibate for over 3 years. I decided to become celibate to strengthen my relationship with God and save myself for my partner. I would love to be married one day. I believe sexual experiences should be cherished. 

Waist beads can be used as reminder of your celibacy journey and what it means to you. Traditionally, waist beads are worn only for a womans husband but if you wish to be married you can wear them for yourself until that husband finds you and makes you his wife. 

If you are not celibate you can still wear them for sexual pleasure but if you are they can be used as a tool to remind you of what you wish to receive from your marriage based on the creation of the bead and the devotion you have to saving yourself for your future partner